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How to let go of anger?

Instagram anger is hurt that is not expr

There is always a hurt associated with anger.

When some says or does something that makes us angry, most people react and shout back in anger as well and the angrier we get, the louder our voices become. This happens because our hearts are becoming further and further apart and we need to shout in order to be heard.

There is a beautiful quote about anger that explains what happens when people start shouting at each other:

“For the tongue is a smouldering fire, and excess of speech a deadly poison.
Material fire consumes the body, whereas the fire of the tongue devours both
heart and soul. The force of the former lasts but for a time, whilst the effects
of the latter endures a century.”  - Baha’u’llah

What do you do when someone makes you angry?

When you feel really angry, get that feeling OUT as soon possible. Let it all out and express that hurt. Anger is unexpressed hurt. When you express the hurt and say it out loud, the anger is released.

Replace the word “Anger” in your mind with “Hurt” or say: “I Am Hurt” Find a quiet place and talk to yourself, find a mirror and imagine that person who hurt you is right in front of you and say to that person:


“I am hurt, what you did hurt me because……. I am hurt because you won’t listen to me ……. etc. “


"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of
throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned." - Buddha

Change you internal self talk or the questions you ask yourself: Instead of asking yourself the question: “Why am I always angry”. Change the question in your mind to: “How do I overcome this hurt?” “How do I let this hurt go?” “How do I change hurt to happiness?”

When you ask yourself a positive question, your mind will provide you with a positive answer.

When you ask a negative question, your will give you a negative answer.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored
than to anything on which it is poured” - Mark Twain

What happens when you DO NOT express that feeling and keep it in:

Feelings are like pearls. Tears and feelings really are pearls of the hearts and when you don’t express your feelings of hurt, what you are doing is really keeping that pearl trapped in that oyster.


The angrier we become the harder that oyster seals shut and keeps that pearl trapped within. Feel the feelings until it no longer needs to be felt.  

When you address the hurt and voice it out loud and say it, then the feeling says: ”I am glad you got it, I can go away now”

Negative feelings become toxic when you do not express it and keep it in your heart. Feelings do damage when they are kept in. Chinese medicine believes that anger burns the liver.


"Jealousy consumes the body and anger burns the liver: avoid these
two as you would a lion" - Baha’u’llah

In summary: 


  1. When you are angry, express that hurt as soon as possible.

  2. Change the word anger into hurt.

  3. Change the questions you ask yourself that is associated with that hurt, and ask yourself: What can I do the become happy and let go of hurt and let go of that pearl trapped within me.

  4. Remember tears are pearls of the heart and that pearl wants to come out.

  5. Let it go and feel the feeling until it no longer needs to be felt.

Message me or send me an email and I will be happy to work with you and discover ways to let go of anger and let go of those trapped pearls in your heart.